Archives September 2024

by I. B. Lyon

Black panthers are controversial creatures. Many people say there is no such thing as a black panther, and there are definitely none in The Valley. Other people swear they’ve seen one, and they say they’re absolutely real and they live in The Valley. Evidently, they are real, and there is one roaming the Strong River Bend (SRB) area. There have been multiple sightings by five different people recently, so I set off to investigate the situation.

I called the MS Dept. of Wildlife, Parks, & Fisheries, and I talked to their big cat expert, Ima Kouger. She has been with the agency for 25 years, and she’s been studying big cats for many years. Kouger said, “We do not have black panthers in MS. I know people swear we do, but there is no such thing as a black panther. They are not a species or sub species. Of course, there is the Florida panther that has a tan colored coat, and its range is in south and central Florida. But, the black panther is just a myth or urban legend.”

I also joined 2 black panther sightings/stories Facebook groups. To be honest, I didn’t gain much from these groups. People would tell stories of seeing a black panther 25 or 30 years ago, and they would have no pictures. Also, people would post pictures of black house cats, and try to make them look bigger than they actually were to fool people into believing they were panthers. After a couple weeks, I left the groups, but I did have some really good laughs in those couple weeks.

After talking with Ms. Kouger and perusing panther Facebook groups, I set out to talk with the Valleyans that have supposedly seen the big cat recently. I tracked down all five people, but two people declined to be interviewed. The three SRB residents that I talked with were adamant that they’d seen a black panther. All three people managed to get a picture of the cat.

I talked with Billy Ray Pheline first. Pheline said, “We were hanging out at the Strong River a couple weeks ago, and it was around dusk. We were getting ready to leave, and we heard something splashing in the river a ways off. We looked and that thing was swimming in the river. We couldn’t believe it! We watched it for about 30 seconds, and it got out of the water and ran off. We were able to get a picture of it drinking water before it ran off. Unbelievable! I didn’t believe in them, but now I do.”

Next, I was able to catch up with Khitty Jones. She said, “Recently, we’ve heard our dog playing with something in the back yard at night. We tried a couple times to see what it was, but we never saw anything. 3 nights ago, we finally saw what Buster was playing with. It was a black panther! Our jaws hit the floor when we finally saw it. Evidently, Buster and the panther have formed a friendship, and they like to play at night. We were able to get a picture before it ran off into the woods. It was so neat!”

Last, but not least, I talked with Jagwyre Black. Black said, “We’ve had a problem with a fox or other critters getting our chickens at night. But, we haven’t lost one in a while, and I wondered why because we haven’t changed anything. I think I figured it out. I’m pretty sure a black panther has been hanging out by our barn and coup, and I think it’s protecting our chickens. I know that sounds crazy. I saw it one evening by the barn, and I setup a game camera. Believe it or not, I was able to get a good picture of him about a week ago. People think I’m crazy, but it is what it is.”

At the SRVO, we just give you the facts, and let you decide. Do we have black panthers in MS and in The Valley? We’ll let you decide.

by Mack Speed

We had a great night at The Track Saturday night, and we had a big raucous crowd. I think it might’ve been the biggest crowd we’ve ever had. I noticed car tags from Warren, Attala, George counties and more, so there were some people that drove quite a ways to watch the SRVMRL.

We only had a couple small parking issues, and I think it was some out-of-towners that’ve never been to The Track. So, my parking guys are getting better, and all those Powerpoint presentations are paying off. Also, some people that didn’t make it to the first race of the season a couple weeks ago were very complimentary of the new bathrooms.

We had a ton of fans tailgating outside The Track. I noticed that most people are tailgating in groups according to their college football teams. So, we had the Ole Miss crew with their fancy chandelier and their catered food. Of course, they were dressed to the nine. Then, we had a lot of MSU fans tailgating together, but they all seemed to be a little down. Maybe it has something to do with their football team this year. You’d hear the occasional cowbell ringing, and then you’d hear a Hotty Toddy chant break out afterwards. We also had a gathering of USM fans. One group that really surprised me was some LSU fans; I guess most of them drove up from South MS. They were a small rowdy bunch. We even had one LSU fan dress up like Coach O, and he kept yelling “Geaux Tigahs.”

Rusty Moore and his sportsbook was popping! The sportsbook is setup in an old deer hunting shooting house. We just cut off the 4x4s on the corners so it rests on the ground. Maybe we’ll be able to get a little nicer one in the future. But, Rusty had his hands full, and that dude was busy. I’ve had multiple people complaining about his money lines; I’m sure he’ll get better with time. I think we’re going to have to ban racers and their family members from betting on the races. I think we might have some questionable wagers on the race Saturday night, and I have reason to believe one was the family member of a racer. I’ll conduct an investigation to find out.

The races were great this week. My boy, Dale Earnhardt Speed, won yet again. But, he did have some competition in this race. Juan Pablo Logano pushed him pretty hard and finished a close 2nd. Ricky Harvick was pushing Juan and Dale pretty hard until he had an engine issue. I’m hoping these boys will continue to push Dale, because it’s been a breeze for him since day one.

Now, to the main race. We had some controversy this week. Tony Johnson ended up winning the race; he stayed clean and ran a good hard race. But, Jimmie Stewart and Jeff Petty were going at it big time. Jimmie started bumping him on lap 1, and he really didn’t let up all night. It was almost like Jimmie didn’t care about winning the race; it looked like he just didn’t want Jeff to win. I guess Jimmie was trying to send a message that he didn’t like an upstart like Jeff winning the previous race. Luckily, Stewart and Petty didn’t get into a physical altercation after the race, but they did have words that couldn’t be used in Sunday school.

Also, Jimmie Stewart’s brother placed a big bet on Tony Johnson. That seems fishy, so we’re going to look into that. We’re probably going to have to ban racers and their family members placing bets on the races.

I appreciate everyone coming out to The Valley Motor Speedway Saturday night! We’ll see you again on Oct. 5th. Let’s have the biggest crowd yet.

by Ben BeEssen

Dr. Siggy Froyd is one of the most cited and respected psychiatrists in the U.S. He is the Director of Clinical Psychiatry at the Strong River Valley Regional Center (SRVRC). He has diagnosed 3 mental disorders, and he’s regularly cited in psychiatry journals and magazines. You’ll be hard-pressed to find a living psychiatrist with a better resume.

Froyd began focusing on adolescent psychiatry about 5 years ago. He realized American youth were suffering from more and more psychiatric issues, and he wanted to do what he could to help with these issues. Much of Froyd’s work has recently been focused on gender dysphoria among adolescents. He’s published many articles and papers on that issue. But, Froyd looked around the past couple years, and he observed a phenomenon that he felt needed his urgent attention.

Froyd said, “Last spring when the weather started warming, I noticed adolescents continued wearing hoodies in the warmer weather. I thought that was interesting. I continued observing these adolescents into the summer, and many continued to wear hoodies in 90 plus degree heat. I was baffled by this behavior, and I felt this needed to be examined further.”

Froyd organized a group of 3 of his trusted psychiatrists to begin a study to look at this issue. The study was able to observe 284 adolescents over a 12 month period that ended last month. After 12 months of observations and a lot of work by his psychiatrists, Froyd was able to diagnose a new mental illness- climate dysphoria disorder (CDD). Froyd and his team published a paper in the Journal of Adolescent Psychiatry, and now CDD is a recognized mental illness.

Froyd said, “It made no sense to me why these adolescents were wearing hoodies in the muggy hot summer weather of The Valley. There’s no way I could do it. My team and I observed that the adolescents continued wearing hoodies into the fall and winter, so they were wearing these hoodies year round. We wondered if maybe the hoodies were possibly made of light, breathable material, but they were not. The vast majority were cotton like the hoodies of old.

Froyd said, “We talked multiple times with all 284 of our subjects, and we observed all of them for at least 12 hours. We then organized all the data, and we found that we’d discovered a new mental illness. We published our findings in the Journal of Adolescent Psychiatry, and it’s been getting a ton of publicity. Currently, there is no clear cause for CDD, and there is no treatment plan for it. Also, it doesn’t harm the adolescents; they can always remove the hoodie or not wear one to begin with.”

Froyd said that parents dealing with kids with CDD have a couple remedies for the illness. He said parents could simply not buy hoodies for their kids, and they could remove hoodies from their kids’ closets when the weather begins to warm in the spring and summer.

Some Valley parents I talked with were glad to learn of Froyd’s discovery. One parent said, “I’m glad to know about this. I was worried about my son wearing a hoodie in 95 degree weather. I thought he was a complete moron, but now we know that he probably has CDD. I was worried, but this makes me feel a lot better. I will probably cut off the sleeves of one or two of his hoodies; they will be his summer hoodies. He’ll be looking like Bill Belichick, but that’s ok.”

Dr. Froyd and his colleagues will be working on a treatment protocol for CDD in the coming weeks and months. The SRVO will be here to bring it to you once it’s released.

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

Valley Prep is one of the premier private schools in MS. Their academics are top notch. It’s a very expensive and exclusive school, and they have very stringent admission requirements. They send multiple kids to Ivy League schools and some of the top universities in the country each year. Their athletic programs are a bit lacking though.

Valley Prep has a small enrollment, so numbers for football has always been an issue. In addition to low numbers, losing has been an issue for Valley Prep football too. They have won only one game in the past 3 seasons. This spring, the injury bug hit the program, and they lost 7 players to injury. A few of the players were not going to be ready to play this fall. After the past few years and the fact this fall was going to be a struggle, Valley Prep shut their football program down late this spring.

Coach Lane Freeze and many of the players were heartbroken about the program being shut down. Coach Freeze approached the administration the week after the program was shut down about starting a flag football program. He had already talked with most of the players, and they were on board. The administration thought it was a good idea, and they gave Coach Freeze the go ahead to start the program with only one caveat. If the first season goes well, he has to start a girls program too.

Coach Freeze said, “I had to do something or I was going to be out of a job. I probably could’ve coached girls junior high basketball or volleyball, but I’d rather dig ditches wearing a ski jacket in Saudi Arabia in August. Flag football is going to be a much better fit for our guys. We’re not very fast, athletic, or physical, so the flag game is a much more natural fit.”

Currently, there are no other flag football programs in the state and The Valley besides Valley Prep. But, Coach Freeze was able to schedule 6 games with other schools, and those schools will use their normal football players. Freeze said, “We were ahead of the curve like usual. Flag football is growing; it’s going to be in the Olympics in 2028. So, I think you’ll see more schools add it to their athletic programs.”

Unfortunately, Valley Prep’s flag football season has started like football seasons in the past. They’re now 0-3 with 3 games left to play. Freeze said, “It’s been a tough start to the season, but these kids are fighting hard. These kids are learning to face adversity head on. I tell them that everyone faces adversity, but it’s all about how you handle it. It’s about attitude and the power of positive thinking. Of course, I don’t tell them the truth. We’re not going to win because we’re not any good; we’re small, slow, and not athletic.”

There has been mixed opinions among Valley Prep parents and fans. One player’s father said, “Honestly, I hate this flag football crap. Valley Prep had a good opportunity to instill mental and physical toughness into these kids by continuing normal football, but they just basically quit when things got hard. It’s just pathetic. This would’ve never happened when I was growing up. If we had only 11, we would’ve played with 11. This is what’s wrong with America; when things get hard, we just lay down and quit. The real men need to stand up!”

I talked with another player’s mom. She said, “I was excited when I found out they were switching to flag football. Now, I really don’t have to worry about my son getting injured. Plus, the whole atmosphere around normal football just wreaks of toxic masculinity, and I don’t want my son to exude that. I hope they never to go back to normal football.”

We’ll see if Valley Prep can manage to get a win, but it looks bleak right now. It’ll be interesting to see if other schools start flag football programs as the popularity grows. The Olympics in 2028 could be the catalyst to get it going. We’ll see.

by Mack Speed

Hello Valleyans! The Strong River Valley Mower Racing League (SRVMRL) is back for season 2. Season 1 was a success, but there were definitely some things we needed to improve upon, and we believe we’ve made some good improvements. We now have restrooms with real toilets, real sinks, and a real feeding trough urinal for the guys. No more porta potties! Gentleman, we ran out of money for multiple urinals with partitions for privacy. So, you’ll have to pee in a feeding trough next to other guys, but at least it won’t smell like a porta potty.

Also, we have good news for you degenerate gamblers out there. The Valley Motor Speedway now has a sports book, so you can bet on the races! After weeks of talks with the MS Gaming Commission, we finally got it approved. Rusty Moore will be the manager of the sports book, and he will also be our handicapper. So, he’ll have odds for each adult race; there will no betting on the junior races. Rusty will also be the money changer, so y’all be patient with him. He has to wear many hats. I expect the book to be a good revenue stream for us in the future.

We had a great crowd for the first race of the season; I estimate that we had over 1,500 people there. Most were from The Valley, but I saw quite a few car tags from outside The Valley. The Ole Miss fans were back tailgating with their chandelier and fancy catered food. Of course, the ladies were dressed to the nine.

I was happy with our parking guys. We only had a couple minor issues with our parking. I held a meeting with a Powerpoint with my guys beforehand, so we were all on the same page. Some people just don’t like to be told what to do.

Now, to the races. The junior race was a bit of a snoozer. My son, Dale Earnhardt Speed, picked up where he left off last season. He won easily. The other junior drivers are really going to have to step up their game if they’re going to compete with Dale. He takes after his dad, that boy can race.

The main race was a pretty darn good race. Jeff Petty won a very close race. Petty came on strong at the end of last season, and he was really pushing Jimmie Stewart and Tony Johnson. Petty just stayed clean and out of the way of Stewart and Johnson; those guys go at each other pretty hard. Petty has the attention of those guys now, so I expect them to make adjustments for the next race.

Thanks for coming out to the Valley Motor Speedway! We’ll see you again on Sept. 21st.

by I. B. Lyon

The Valley County Election Commission (VCEC) had high hopes of hosting a presidential debate this fall. The Commission had been in talks and negotiations for weeks with the Commission on Presidential Debates (CPD) and the Harris and Trump campaigns. The candidates had agreed on a date- Sept. 31st. The location was down to two cities- Valley City, MS and Indianapolis, IN.

VCEC chairman Tucker Lemon said, “We submitted a great proposal to the CPD, and we had high hopes we’d land the debate. But, in the end, the CPD and the campaigns chose Indianapolis over The Valley. This would’ve been huge for The Valley, but it is what it is. I talked with officials with the CDP after we were told we would not be hosting the debate, and they lined out the reasons we were not chosen.”

In our discussion, Lemon explained the reasons to me The Valley was not chosen. VCEC was going to use the Valley City Civic Center as the venue, and it only holds 500 people. The Trump campaign said that it wouldn’t hold enough people, and the optics just wouldn’t be good for him. The Harris campaign said that there would be too many people in a live audience, and they would not do a debate with a live audience.

The VCEC wanted me, I. B. Lyon (yours truly), to be the debate moderator. But, the Trump campaign said I was too liberal and couldn’t be unbiased, and the Harris campaign said I was a radical conservative. Maybe I shouldn’t have posted so much on social media about my Libertarian views like legalizing recreational marijuana. And, I have shared a few Joe Rogan and Tucker Carlson videos recently. Sorry VCEC and The Valley.

Additionally, the VCEC proposed a unique format where the candidates would sit at a round table for the debate. The Trump campaign insisted both candidates have to stand at podiums. The Harris campaign insisted that both candidates sit in nice padded chairs with no table. Evidently, Trump wanted to be able to show off his signature Trump branded red tie at the podium, and Harris didn’t want her Hillary style pants suit to be hidden by the podium. Additionally, the VCEC put a clause in their proposal that uncontrollable laughing and repeating phrases multiple times wouldn’t be tolerated and would be muted. Evidently, this was frowned upon by both campaigns as well.

Lemon said, “We were very disappointed we were weren’t chosen, but we’ll try again in 4 years. We learned a lot through this process, so we’ll be better prepared next time. As the VCEC chairman, make sure you’re registered to vote before Nov., and make sure you show up at the polls and exercise your constitutional right to vote.”

Valleyans, even though we were beat out by Indianapolis for the debate, make sure to tune in at 7:00 pm on Sept. 31st to watch the presidential debate. Hopefully, that will be us in 4 years.