Archives May 2024

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

T-ball is normally a circus; some would call it cat herding. Generally, the kids have no idea what’s going on. They’ll pile on each other going after the ball. They’ll sometimes run to the wrong base. Little Johnny will be sitting down playing in the dirt. It’s just adorable and hilarious.

The above is what you see with most t-ball teams, but that is not what you’ll see with Coach Bobby Cox’s team. Coach Cox has tryouts for his team. Kids on his team have to know the fundamentals, and they have to be able to pay attention. You won’t see a kid on his team playing in the dirt. He practices for 2 hours 3 times per week, so he takes it serious.

Cox said, “You see all this travel ball, and it normally starts with 7 or 8 year olds. That’s fine, but I felt I needed to up the ante a little bit. Why not start a travel or select t-ball team? A lot of these t-ball parents are serious about their kids learning the game, and I don’t think you can start too early. So, I decided to form the Termites. We’re the only travel t-ball team in The Valley and the state that I’m aware of. Once, people hear about the Termites, I think more coaches will form travel t-ball teams too. I’m going to do a t-ball tournament soon, and hopefully it will kickstart travel t-ball in The Valley.”

Currently, the Termites don’t have any other travel or select t-ball teams to play against. They’re just practicing 3 nights per week hoping the tournament will help them find some teams to play. The parents are very excited about the Termites and what Coach Cox brings to the table.

One Termite Mom said, “I’m so excited for Little Timmy and the Termites. These kids are working so hard, and they are improving so much. I can’t wait to cheer on the Termites each weekend! We want Timmy to specialize in baseball, and the Termites is a great start. A lot of people think I’m crazy for doing this, but you can never start them too young.”

One Termite Dad said, “Coach Cox is what these boys need. He expects excellence, and he won’t take anything less. He doesn’t allow crying, and he makes the boys pay attention at all times. No parents are allowed in the dugout. If a kid’s not paying attention, he makes the kid do 10 push ups. That’s old school, and kids need that these days. Coach Cox is already working with Little Johnny on batting from the left and right sides. He also works with the boys on back handing ground balls too. They all can catch pop ups. Being on the Termites is only going to help Little Johnny get on a really good travel team when he turns 7, and that’s what we want.”

Some people think a travel t-ball team is over the top, but Coach Cox and his parents feel otherwise. Coach Cox said, “Some people think we’re crazy, but we’re not. We’re just passionate about the game. I just saw a need and filled that need. Parents wanted to start their kids out young learning the game, and that’s what the Termites is all about. I’m hoping this travel t-ball will really take off, but we’ll see.”

We’ll see if this travel t-ball will take off like Coach Cox and the Termite parents hope it will. Time will tell, but I have my doubts. The SRVO will keep you updated about Coach Cox and his little Termites.

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

The 2nd Annual Strong River Valley Pickleball Open took place on Saturday at the Valley City Municipal Complex pickleball courts. There was a big raucous crowd, and everyone was excited about this event. Pickleball fever has finally found its way into The Valley, and it’s not letting up anytime soon. Last year, most of the players were from central MS, but this year’s tournament drew players from all across MS. The SRVO is thrilled to sponsor this tournament, and we look forward to supporting it for years to come.

Last year’s tournament was only for women, but men were allowed to play this year. Men’s singles, men’s doubles, and mixed doubles divisions were added to this year’s event. So, there were more than double the participants in this year’s tournament. This year’s tournament results also went toward the MS Pickleball Tour’s rankings, so that was a big draw for the players.

The Valley fans were amazed with all the BMWs, Mercedes, and Audi vehicles with Hinds and Madison County plates. There were more 30A stickers than you could shake a stick at. The pickle ballers and their fans from outside The Valley were amazed at the mullets, tattoos, and vaping of the Valleyans. It’s quite a contrast, but it’s a beautiful thing.

Mary Grace Evert was back to defend her women’s singles title from last year. She is currently ranked #1 in MS. She breezed through the draw, but she did face a battle in the final. Valleyan, Veanus Vanderford, gave her a scare in the finals, but Evert pulled through in the end.

The Valley’s favorite women’s doubles duo, Sarena Smith and Veanus Vanderford, showed out again this year. They were determined to win it this year; they’ve been working hard since they came up short last year. Their hard work paid off, and they brought home the trophy this year. The duo’s fans were instrumental in their run; they were raucous and they willed them to the title. Smith said, “I’ve worked hard on my fitness, and I’ve cut out gas station pizza and fried catfish. It paid off! I’m so happy!” Vanderford added, “Sarena inspired me, so I stopped vaping and got my act together. We’ve worked so hard! We’re the champs!”

The men’s doubles draw was the one to watch. There was a ton of drama. Jonny McEnroe and Steve Edberg breezed their way to the final. The attorneys from Madison are the #1 ranked team in MS. They faced the young upstarts from Strong River Bend, Ethan Burnham and Owen Patrick. The teens are baseball players that have recently picked up pickleball as a hobby to try to pickup girls. No one expected the teen duo to do well, but they played very hard and made their way to the final. Valley fans were not fond of the smug duo from Madison, and the attorneys seemed to relish in the crowd’s animosity. At one point, the young duo’s supporters started a Let’s Go Brandon chant that briefly halted play.

The young duo got off to a hot start on McEnroe and Edberg. The boys’ families and friends were so pumped and loud, and it was clearly affecting the attorneys from Madison. But, in the end, the experience of the elder duo paid off, and they won a tight match. McEnroe said, “It got a little crazy, but we pulled through in the end. These fans from The Valley are insane. I’ve never seen so many mullets, tattoos, and vaping in my life. The only thing that could possibly be worse than listening to these fans would be attending a Florida Georgia Line concert. And, they had more than water and sweet tea in those red Solo cups. But, we’ll be back by popular demand next year to defend our title.”

Owen Patrick said, “We didn’t know what to expect; we were just out here having fun. Our fans were awesome, and we can’t wait til next year! I got a couple Madison girls’ numbers and IG follows, so that was a good thing too. I think it’s my mullet perm. Those lawyers from Madison better be ready next year. We coming baby!”

A tournament goer nicknamed the Valley fans the Solo Cup Brigade. A ton of them were walking around with red Solo cups sipping on something. Alcohol is prohibited on the grounds of the Valley City Municipal Complex, so we there’s no way it could be alcohol right? One Valley fan said, “The Solo Cup Brigade! I love it baby! We’ll have red t-shirts next year with that on it. They’ve created a monster!”

The men’s singles title was won by Rafie Jokavich, and that was no surprise. The #1 ranked male in MS breezed through the draw while barely breaking a sweat.

I left before the mixed doubles final was over, and I haven’t received the results. No one cares to be honest; no one was watching the mixed doubles matches anyway.

We’ll see you next year at the SRV Open. This event is going to be a big draw going forward, and the SRVO is just honored to be a part of it.

by Ben BeEssen

Ricky’s on the River has been a popular restaurant on the Strong River for years. Valleyans love their fried catfish and seafood, and the place is always buzzing on Thursday, Friday, and Saturdays nights. Ricky decided to take advantage of the crawfish craze this year and have a crawfish eating contest. He publicized the contest on social media, and they had a great crowd this past Saturday night for the festivities.

The first annual Ricky’s on the River Mudbug Mayhem was held Saturday night. It was a huge event, and there was a large raucous crowd. The Dirtdobbers were performing live music, and the place was crazy. There were 8 eaters that signed up for the contest. The overwhelming favorite was Billy Boudreaux; he’s well known in Louisiana and the Gulf Coast region for consuming other worldly amounts of crawfish. He’s known as the Joey Chestnut of competitive crawfish eating. He travels around to any crawfish eating contest he can find. The other 7 contestants had no competitive eating experience, so no one gave them a shot.

Contestants had 15 minutes to eat as many crawfish as possible. There were 3 judges, and the judges inspected the final trays and made sure all the crawfish were eaten. With only 15 minutes, the contestants had to be efficient in popping or peeling the tails and getting to the meat. That’s where Billy Boudreaux really separates himself. He can pop those tails off in his sleep; he’s an absolute machine. As you would expect, Boudreaux started off strong and really ran away from the competition. About 5 minutes in, all the contestants stopped for a moment and just watched Boudreaux. He was in an absolute zone. He ended up stopping around the 8 minute mark, because he knew the competition was basically over and he wasn’t feeling well. He sat back and sipped on a Coors Light. He ended up eating 159 crawfish in the allotted 15 minutes. His nearest competitor, Ron Reddclaw, ate 127 crawfish. Boudreaux could’ve easily eaten over 300 if he wouldn’t have had an upset stomach.

Things got interesting after the contest was over. Evidently, no one read the fine print. One contest rule stated that contestants would be disqualified if they vomited within 5 minutes of the end of the contest. Boudreaux hadn’t felt his best that day. He vomited violently two times right after the contest was over. He said, “Something was off with my stomach; I don’t know what it was. But, athletes sometimes have to play injured, and that’s what I did. I knew I wasn’t going to be able to hold em down after it was over. I had no idea about this 5 minute rule. It’s a bunch of bs. I won it fair and square and everybody knows it. They are just jealous, and they didn’t want me to win in the first place. They didn’t want a Cajun coming up here and dunkin on em.”

Boudreaux yelled obscenities at the judges after he was informed he was not the winner, and he had to be restrained by his handlers. A few of his Cajun friends had some not so kind words for the judges as well. When asked what the Cajuns said, a couple bystanders said that they weren’t sure, but they know they were really mad. The event organizers said they’ll have security present at next year’s contest. Reddclaw was announced as the winner. Boudreaux said, “They better be glad I wasn’t feeling well, cuz I would’ve opened a can on em. It wouldn’t have been pretty. I’ll be back next year, and I can’t wait!”

Reddclaw reluctantly accepted the trophy. He said, “I won on a technicality, but I won. My name is on the trophy. No one will ever be able to take that away from me.” The first annual Ricky’s on the River Mudbug Mayhem was a big hit, and I’m sure it will only grow in popularity in the coming years. The SRVO will be back at Ricky’s this time next year to give you the rundown.

by Emma Embellischer

Rompers or jumpsuits have taken the fashion world by storm this year. Love them or hate them, you see them everywhere. Valley fashionista, Coco Prada, has decided to take advantage of the romper mania and open a store on Main St. in Valley City. Prada’s store, called Romper Realm, will sell rompers and a small number of fashion accessories.

Prada said, “I was surprised when rompers came back in style this year. The things are hideous. But, I thought I could take advantage of the madness and open a store that sells only rompers. I know we’re the only storefront in The Valley that sells rompers only, and I’m pretty sure we’re the only one in Mississippi and the South. You have to differentiate yourself in the fashion market today, and that’s what I think I’ve done.”

Prada’s store will have just about every romper imaginable. She’ll have some with sleeves, no sleeves, short rompers, and long rompers. She’ll carry many different fabrics and many different styles, and she will have competitive prices. She will also sell rompers and other items on her website- www.romperrealm.com. Additionally, she will carry rompers for men. Prada said, “Believe it or not, men are buying rompers these days, so we wanted to carry some for men. We’ll have some American and patriotic themed rompers for men to get them in the door. I’d never date a guy that would wear a romper, but that’s just me.”

Another draw for Prada’s store is that it is pet friendly, so shoppers are encouraged to bring their dogs, cats, and other animals in the store. She will also have one of those cool photo booths that the yuppies love these days. That will be a big draw for the young ladies to come in and shop and take pictures in the booth.

Prada will host a Facebook live event next Friday night at the store to showcase her rompers. She’ll have models to show off the rompers, and she plans to generate a lot of excitement and anticipation for the grand opening which will be in 3 weeks. However, she is having trouble finding any men to model her male rompers. She’s willing to pay a few men to model for a few hours, so contact Prada if you’re interested men.

Valleyans are mixed about Romper Realm. One young female said, “I’m so pumped about this store! I love rompers, but they’re not always true to size on me. So, I’m so happy that I’ll be able to try some on before I buy them.” A middle aged female said, “I know I’m a grandma, but I’m single now. A nice romper will really catch the eyes of younger single men. I’ll definitely be shopping at Romper Realm.”

One young husband said, “My wife thinks she has to keep up with the latest fashion trends, but she hasn’t bought a romper yet. I know she’ll want one now. The things are hideous, and they should be outlawed.”

Romper Realm is already generating a lot of buzz. The SRVO always roots for local small businesses, and we hope it thrives.

by Carl “Bull” Crapper

Everyone is busy these days. We pack more into our schedules now than ever before. We go, go, go all the time. Many parents, including myself, are basically chauffeurs these days. They take the kids to school, and they pick them up in the afternoons. Then, they’re off to ball practice or ball games at night. You have church on Wednesdays and Sundays, and you have ball on the weekends. This on the go lifestyle lends itself to some things being neglected. Mom and Dad just don’t have enough time to do it.

Valley entrepreneur and tech investor, Elon Jobs, understands this busy lifestyle. He’s a busy parent himself. He’s been working on a solution for some time, and he just released an app to help parents with their kids’ transportation needs. Jobs’ new app is called Husl, and it is basically Uber for kids.

Jobs knew parents would like the idea of the app, but he knew many would have reservations leaving their kids in the hands of strangers. So, Husl has put some safeguards in place to protect kids and help parents feel comfortable. Jobs said, “All Husl drivers have to pass background checks, and they can have no criminal history. They also have to have a valid drivers license. Also, there has to be two or more kids on every ride. A child cannot ride alone for any period of time. Additionally, a camera must be installed in every Husl driver’s vehicle. Mom and dad can view the camera at any time from the Husl app. Mom, dad, a grandparent or approved guardian has to choose the kids’ destination in the app, and they will receive notifications when the kids are picked up and dropped off at their destination. Parents should feel confident about their kids’ safety because of the safeguards we’ve put in place.”

Another neat feature of the app is that it allows parents to request a certain driver. So, if parents or kids know and like a certain driver, they can request that driver. Parents really like this feature, and it makes them feel at ease when they know they’ll have someone they know and trust driving their kids around.

Unlike Uber, Husl users pay a monthly fee of $35 per child. Uber users pay per ride. Husl users receive a $5 discount for each additional child. The app is live now, and Valley parents are downloading it like crazy. It’s the talk of the select ball parents community; they are the majority of the early adopters. They love the app.

One mom said, “It’s so nice not to be at the ball field every freakin night of the week. I can actually stay at home and cook supper for a change. Plus, I can clean the house myself. I’ll be able to spend less on Husl than on my house cleaning lady now, so it’ll help us save money. My son and a few of his teammates ride to and from practice together now, and they always ride with Mr. Billy. They love Mr. Billy. Husl is awesome!”

One dad said, “I’ll actually be able to cut my grass now. Before, I was never home in the evenings because I was always chasing the kids around to this and that activity. Also, I’ll be able to get some honey do’s done around the house. I won’t have to hear my wife constantly nagging me about getting things done around the house. Thanks Husl!”

Adoption of Husl will continue to increase. It’s huge in The Valley, but word is starting to spread outside The Valley as well. Jobs thinks it’ll be a household name like Uber in the coming months. He said, “Word of mouth is really helping us. Parents love having extra free time because of Husl. It will be a household name in the not so distant future.”

The app can be downloaded via the Apple and Android stores, and it is free to download. It will be interesting to see Husl’s growth going forward.

by Heeza de Seaver

Pro Palestinian/pro Gaza protests have broken out at colleges across the country in the past couple weeks. The protests at Columbia University and UCLA have gotten the most attention, but there have been some other high profile protests as well. At some of the colleges, the protesters have been treated with kid gloves, and the colleges have given concessions to them. At other schools, the protests have been squashed, and the protesters have been arrested.

5 pro Palestinian protesters showed up at the Valley Institute of Technology, affectionately referred to as Valley Tech, yesterday morning at approximately 8:30 am. Valley Tech is located in the Valley Plaza strip mall in Valley City just off Hwy. 13. Valley Tech is the anchor of the strip mall, and it’s located in the old Dougie’s Dollar Den. Valley Tech is an online college, so students are not there on a daily basis. They have 164 students currently, and they have 8 full time employees at the location in Valley City.

Valley Plaza security guard, Andy Fife, saw the protesters get out of a vehicle in the parking lot. He quickly told all the tenants including Valley Tech to lock their doors. The protesters headed to Valley Tech, but they couldn’t get it in. So, they stood in front of Valley Tech and began protesting and chanting. Fife said, “I called my deputy, Barney Griffith, to come join me. Generally, I only call him when there’s a big sale at one of the stores and for the annual Valley City Circus in the parking lot. I wanted him there in case these people started acting a fool.”

Fife said, “I let them protest until Barney showed up, and then I told them that they had to leave. They yelled some obscenities at us, and they told me that I was a Fascist colonizer. Barney wanted me to call the police, but I told him that we could easily handle these light weights. They said they weren’t leaving, and I told them we can do this the hard way if you want to. I told Barney I would get the 3 guys, and he could take care of the 2 gals. We had to drag each protester away to their vehicle. A couple were way too big to carry, so we just drug them one by one. One of the girls did give Barney some trouble, so he just picked her up and dropped her by their vehicle. They didn’t resist me; they didn’t want any smoke. They know I don’t play.”

The protesters had their eye on the American flag in the parking lot after being dragged to their vehicle. Fife said, “They said they were going to take the down the American flag and raise a Palestinian flag, and I told them they better not think about doing that. You better not mess with Old Glory. I told them that I would mace them in a heartbeat. They got in their car and drove off.”

It’s surprising that protesters showed up in Valley City. This idyllic town has never experienced anything like this, but things are crazy these days. Fife said, “I don’t think these morons even go to school at Valley Tech; they were probably paid. One of them misspelled Palestine on her sign; they probably couldn’t locate Palestine on a map if their lives depended on it. They better be glad we got rid of them before Gary’s Gun Shop opened up. His customers would’ve treated them much harsher than Barney and me.”

None of the protesters could be reached for comment. Valley Tech put out a statement thanking Andy and Barney for taking care of the situation.